Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Up And Down

Since last Wednesday my emotions have been all over the place.  Despite what I wrote in my previous entry about fully trusting the Lord with our situation, it does not negate the fact that I do have emotions.  That is how He created us- to feel, to emote.  Eric and I are in a season where our emotions are intense and can be happy one moment and sad the next.

For Eric when he is upset or stressed he gets stomach aches and then tends to get sick.  The poor man has been sick more than once in the past several days.  He is not ill with a virus or anything, it is stress.  It is concern for his son.  Just this morning he went to pick up a gallon of milk from the store and he saw a father with his grown son.  What grabbed Eric's attention was that the grown son had Down Syndrome.  Eric said he watched the father and son interact and it was so obvious that the father loves his son so very much.  I know that it caused Eric to think about Dima and long for him.

Me?  I get to where I have no appetite, a forced fast of sorts.  I cry a lot and it usually just comes about suddenly.  I would liken my emotions to that of a pregnant woman.  To clarify, I am not expecting!  I spent the better part of yesterday afternoon looking for relevant news articles about the closure in Dima's country.  It was my hope that maybe I would get some concrete answers.  Sadly, there was nothing new.  I did, however, contact the US Embassy in the capital of Dima's country to see if they could maybe provide some answers.  This morning I received a response to my email and it was very general and most likely a formatted email since they are inundated with frantic parents trying to get answers.  Since they did not answer the question I asked I wrote them once again.  That is what a mother does.  She fights for her children, will hound whomever she must, she will cry out to God for protection over her children, she will weep in despair.....  A mother's love is probably one of the most powerful forces on this planet (after the power of God, of course!).

So what do we do in the meantime?  Pray.  Pray some more.  Pray as though a little boy's life depends upon it; because it does.  That and we must continue to trust.  Even though this momma would move heaven and earth to get to Dima and bring him home, I cannot do that.  If I did not know the Lord I cannot imagine getting through this without feeling utterly hopeless.  But I DO know my Lord and I know that when I am crying he is counting the tears and holding me close.  He is also with Dima, watching over him and protecting him.  God knows the outcome of our uncertain situation and that is what allows me to be able to move on after a good cry.

On a positive note I am super grateful that this week is our church's Vacation Bible School.  Last night was the first night and I had so much fun with everyone.  I also received some wonderful encouragement from a special momma who adopted her daughter from China 11 years ago.  Her love, encouragement, and support gave me hope that God can work a miracle for Dima.

Please keep praying for Dima and his country's government.  Pray that they move quickly while making the necessary changes to the branch of government that will be overseeing adoptions in the future.  Please pray that somehow we are able to get to our son before July 11th....God is able!  

1 comment:

Carla Dobs said...

Yes, you are pregnant...

"paper pregnant"...

pregnant with anticipation of getting to your sweet little boy...

I am there with you my dear...

Carla
www.bringinghenryhome.blogspot.com